I love this letter that arrived the other day from United Utilities. Ostensibly they're trying to get me to buy their HomeServe insurance, but the way they've phrased it is just this side of sinister. "How would you cope without fresh water at address?" sounds, to me, like a corporate version of "Lovely taps you've got there. Shame if something were to... happen to them."
And they can leave the washing machine out of this, it's done nothing wrong.